TED演讲|C位人生四建议了解一下？,图南英语微信公众号文章

蒋方舟在一档聊天综艺节目《圆桌派》中说：“你必须要么非常努力，要么非常聪明，你才能勉强过上一种平庸的生活。”

当00后不知不觉中快速崛起而我们变身哥哥粉、姐姐粉甚至妈妈粉的时候；当身边人过上开挂的人生快速与财富对接的时候，一眼能够看得到明天的生活似乎变成了一种奢侈的生活。

我们该怎样摆脱这样的困境？怎样的人生才更有意义？

爱好心理学的作家艾米丽·史密斯（Emily Smith）曾经在TED做过一篇《怎样的人生更有意义？这里有四点建议》的演讲，让我们来听听她怎么说！

▲戳视频看艾米丽·史密斯精彩演讲

艾米丽的演讲开头抛出了一个引人深思的问题：

what's the difference between being happy and having meaning in life?
活得快乐和活得有意义之间有什么差别？

接着她又提出：

How can we each live more meaningfully?
我们每个人要如何活得有意义？

于是引出她花费五年时间得出的「人生意义的四大支柱」：

归属感

belonging

The first pillar is belonging. Belonging comes from being in relationships where you're valued for who you are intrinsically and where you value others as well. But some groups and relationships deliver a cheap form of belonging; you're valued for what you believe, for who you hate, not for who you are. True belonging springs from love. It lives in moments among individuals, and it's a choice -- you can choose to cultivate belonging with others.

第一根支柱是归属感。归属感来自于一种关系，一种你与他人在本质上彼此是否处在相互珍惜的关系中。但有些群体或关系，提供的是廉价形式的归属感；你被重视的原因是因为你所相信的事物、你对人的好恶、而不是你的本质。真正的归属感源自于爱。它存在于个体间共处的时光当中，且它是一种选择──你可以选择与他人培养归属感。

belonging：归属感

intrinsically：

本质地；内在地；固有地

spring from：源于

目的

purpose

Of course, for many of us, that happens through work. That's how we contribute and feel needed. But that also means that issues like disengagement at work, unemployment, low labor force participation -- these aren't just economic problems, they're existential ones, too. Without something worthwhile to do, people flounder. Of course, you don't have to find purpose at work, but purpose gives you something to live for, some "why" that drives you forward.

当然，对很多人而言，这是透过工作来达成的。那是我们做出贡献和感到被需要的方式。但这也意味着，像是无心工作、失业、低劳动参与率等等议题──这些不仅是经济问题，也是存在主义问题。人们若没有值得去做的事，就会挣扎折腾。当然，你不需要从工作中找到目的，但目的能让你有活下去的意义，有驱使你向前行的「理由」。

disengagement at work：无心工作

labor force participation：劳动参与

existential：存在主义的；有关存在的；存在判断的

flounder：挣扎，折腾；错乱地做事或说话

live for：赖以生存

drive forward：驱使前行

超然

transcendence

The third pillar of meaning is also about stepping beyond yourself, but in a completely different way: transcendence.Transcendent states are those rare moments when you're lifted above the hustle and bustle of daily life, your sense of self fades away, and you feel connected to a higher reality. For one person I talked to, transcendence came from seeing art. For another person, it was at church.

第三根人生意义的支柱，也和走出自我有关，但用的方式完全不同：超然。超然的状态是很少见的时刻，在这个时刻中，你超脱了日常生活的喧嚣扰攘，自我感正在渐渐消褪，你会感觉到和更高的现实产生连结。跟我谈过的其中一个人说，超然来自于欣赏艺术。另一个人则认为，超然是在教堂中。

stepp beyond yourself：v. 走出自己

transcendence：n. 超越、卓越、超然的存在

hustle and bustle：n. 熙熙攘攘、忙碌

fade away：v.

褪色、慢慢褪去、消逝

讲故事

storytelling

But what makes people change their stories?Some people get help from a therapist, but you can do it on your own, too, just by reflecting on your life thoughtfully, how your defining experiences shaped you, what you lost, what you gained. That's what Emeka did. You won't change your story overnight; it could take years and be painful. After all, we've all suffered, and we all struggle. But embracing those painful memories can lead to new insights and wisdom, to finding that good that sustains you.

但，是什么让人们改变了他们的故事？有些人向治疗师寻求协助，但你也可以靠自己做到，只要完整地反思你的人生、你的关键经历如何造就了你、你失去了什么、获得了什么。那就是埃梅卡所做的。你不可能一夜就改变你的故事；过程可能要花好几年，且很痛苦。毕竟，我们都曾受过苦，也都在挣扎。但拥抱那些痛苦的记忆，能带来新的洞见与智慧，让你能找到那支撑着你的「善」。

therapist：n. 治疗师

reflect on：v. 仔细思考、反省、怀疑

defining experiences：n. 关键性经历

we've all suffered, and we all struggle：我们都曾受苦，也都在挣扎。

insight：n. 洞察力、眼力、深刻见解

sustain：v. 支撑

最后，艾米丽用自己的人生经历做了总结，用父亲的一生将「四大支柱」串连起来：

My dad is a carpenter and a Sufi. It's a humble life, but a good life. Lying there facing death, he had a reason to live: love. His sense of belonging within his family, his purpose as a dad, his transcendent meditation, repeating our names -- these, he says, are the reasons why he survived. That's the story he tells himself.

我的父亲是个木匠也是个苏菲教徒。他的人生是谦恭的人生，但很美好的人生。躺在那里，面对死亡，他有一个活下去的理由：爱。他在他的家庭中的归属感、他身为一名父亲的目的、他超然的冥想，不断覆颂我们的名字──他说，这些是他活下来的原因。那是他告诉他自己的故事。